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Grace Found Me in My Grief

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Grace Found Me in My Grief

“I’ve learned that grief, whether because of the loss of a loved one or loss of a relationship, it comes in like waves. Some waves you anticipate and prepare yourself for. Others come unexpectedly and knock you right off your feet, leaving you with scraped knees, completely disoriented and out of breath because of the near-death fight to stay above water. I can’t always anticipate a trigger. It can be as a random as a familiar scent or as direct as a forgotten Facebook memory (thanks - rolling my eyes). But there is always a way out (1 Corinthians 10:13) if we stay close to where our feet can be grounded. And hope and faith have kept me grounded (Romans 15:13).

Grieving the loss of marriage wasn’t something I ran to share about. But with this new season, comes the responsibility of facing and sharing, not just the joy of the Lord being my strength, but the painful realities of this journey. Many have made assumptions or tried to put two and two together, but ultimately, we both needed time to process without the well-intended but often misguided commentary of the public. And it’s still a process. I intentionally didn’t want to bleed on the ones that prayed for our marriage, prophesied over our marriage, hoped in our marriage or believed because of our marriage. Ultimately, because I still believe in marriage being honorable and beautiful, independent of this reality. That’s why I can genuinely celebrate those getting engaged, married and having more children. Family is beautiful. There is still hope.

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The SON shines above the Clouds

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The SON shines above the Clouds

I open my eyes and look out of the window.  I realize that we have reached optimal altitude and we're cruising above the clouds. Suddenly, my eyes get fixed on how bright the sun is shining. I feel a warmth and peace that can only be explained by the beauty of God's presence. I take my phone out of my pocket and snap a picture. I was reminded how on the ground, the skies were gray and the day seemingly gloomy. The sun was nowhere in sight. One would think that the sun just isn't present when it rains. But with great amazement, once above it, I could see the sun shining ever so brightly and beautifully. I was reminded by a word Shaun (my best friend and father of our daughter) shared years ago, "the sun always shine above the clouds." 

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